Shit.

Is everybody going crazy?

Is anybody gonna save me?

Started off the day with a million F words in my head. The first word in my head this morning was the F word. So was 2nd word. And the F word is the F word. Not fishcake or fishball. Perhaps it's to tell me how bad my day was going to be.

I reached class, plugged in music into my ears and started sleeping. Slept and slept until time for flag raising, rushed down in time to hand in my cheers. Then Mdm Loh reviewed the proposal and all. And gah, I have a lot to do by tomorrow. A lot. A hell lot. So I'm doing it now.

And then, so I was super stressed. A million stuff needed to be done. And then during lecture I was feeling super super tired and stressed. And the talk with Mdm Loh was so long. Plus I'm sick. Still. So I reached the super cold Audi pissed. And then, I cried while watching the movie extract. Exploring the theme of violence now. Grace hanged herself. I cried for her. And then I kept tearing, but I didn't allow them to roll down. If not I can't stop and I'd be noisy. And I was clenching my fists, because I had to fight this strong strong urge to get up and run away. And the song "CRAZY" just kept playing in my head. It was apt. It is on repeat on iTunes now. Ok, but after Bio I guess I was ok.

I am extremely fed up with XXX and XXX in the class. Ok maybe the one that rhymes with moron more. He made a personal attack in class! And I think he really went too far. I had this urge to quarrel with him. Wonder why I didn't. Maybe I'm scared of loud people. And this guy who sits behind him. Eugene said something funny and XXX said: Shut up you bastard. HW and I heard. C'mon, Eugene a bastard? Then you don't deserve to live anyway. You all think you are superior to us and you insult at every possible moment. Get a life lah. (Sorry, Eva) But please we don't even critisize or laugh at you right. So can you just like, buzz off. Where does our class spirit go anyway? Do we even have spirit in the first place. The class is filthy :( And I admit I don't sweep the floor. Cheeguan does. Give him cred. I'm sorry I'm just dishing it all that's in my mind now. Gotta do it before I explode.

I am unsure. I don't know about what, just unsure. April is a busy month. What a nice start of April. I really want to get at least a silver for high jump. But I haven't even practised. And why must the training be at Bishan? It's so freaking far. Gosh. And Theatre Arts has become quite sian. Probably because it's Wednesday, and the school hours are so long, everyone's drained. They just plonk everything in one day.

The only saving grace is volleyball. After TA, the 2cians went down to vball court: Empty. But more people came anyway. And we played nicely! Quite fun. And at the bus stop I feel strangely comforted. People from different classes, different CCAs actually can go together. Like: I know you you know him so we know each other this sorta thing. So we all went home together. Now I don't really mind seeing the same people till J2. Like, the whole level can really know each other and be best friends. Cool eh. And my ball almost got run over by not 1, but many cars. The guys were kicking it around at the bus stop and pooff, it kept going to the road. Take care man. But it seems like a simple sort can unite people (: I love that kinda feeling. And I feel pretty good after a few laughs.

I can't seem to cry like, as much as I want to now. Maybe I'm afraid of questions: Why are you crying? What happened? Just buzz off. Gahh, *takes a deep breath and steadies herself* I've got a long way to go man. A long way.

Tell me what's going on

What's going on

If you open your eyes

You'd see something is wrong